Friday, October 21, 2005

Top Five Crisis Makeovers: the Anti-Monitor

2. The Anti-Monitor.

Supergirl's death was inspiring. Oh, yes! The Anti-Monitor (who actually killed her because he was a secret member of the League of Fashion Assassins -- you know, the ones who keep trying to kill Lois Lane -- and Kara, who was wearing a red headband, for crisis's sake, was just asking for it) took one look at the smoldering corpse of the Maid of Might in her tattered primary color costume and thought soberly,

"Mercy, I wouldn't be caught dead in that outfit!"

Quickly, he hightailed to Gambi's Tailor Shoppe (with five convenient locations, one in a universe near you!).

"Oh, Paul," he complained, "my outfit is so dated, so ... Kirby! I look like a *sob* ... a DOOMBOT! And that vicious little superperson put holes in it and everything! Besides, I've already been defeated in it once, I simply can't be seen in public in it again!"

Paul Gambi chuckled inwardly; he was long familiar with "Anti M's" fashion insecurities. These universe-destroying dowagers are all alike; so afraid they're unknowingly wearing last millenium's styles...

So Gambi whipped up for Auntie Em something fresh, shiny, bright, capeless! Who knew those old Booster Gold uniforms would come in handy?

"Can't ... move," Em muttered as best as his immovable lower jaw would let him. "But you look fabulous, my anti-matter friend," Gambi replied. "I'll just send the bill..."

Heh heh, Gambi chortled silently. Copied that design from a New Genesis marital aid ... but no one will ever tell him that!


Anonymous said...

I believe you'll find that Monitor, Anti-Monitor, and New Anti Monitor were designed to have similar silhouettes...see also Krona in JLA/Avengers #4 and Crisis in Just Imagine Stan Lee's Crisis.

Anonymous said...

A New Genesis Marital Aid, huh?

Um, what end goes in first again?

Bully said...

My Auntie Agnes
Has a better fashion sense
Than Aunt Monitor.

(What? This isn't a haiku thread?)