Speed Saunders and the Hilton Diamond, 4: Wait... what?

 

Speed has stopped by for a casual chat with Darnell The Fence of Stolen Goods.

Smooth, Speed; really smooth.

Darnell is less than cooperative.

You don't get to be as well known of a fence as Darnell without a cool composure.

From this interaction, Speed deduced that the European Diamond Merchant did, in fact, dump the diamond he stole from Jim's dad at Darnell's.

Headquarters! That's where Speed is from, you know.

At Headquarters we learn some very important information from the Chief Coroner.

Specifically, that "Hilton" isn't the name of the hotel, it's the name of Jim's FATHER (and presumably of Jim).  Okay, the hotel COULD be named "Hilton", but the diamond is called the Hilton Diamond because it was stolen from Jim Hilton's father, Mr. Hilton.

Oh, we also learned that Mr. Hilton had been drugged with chloral.  By which the coroner doesn't mean the organic compound trichloroacetaldehyde, but rather the result of its union with water, chloral hydrate, commonly used as a hypnotic or sedative agent since 1869.

You can tell because it looks like a person zonked out on the ground after wiping out while ice-skating.

Speed's assumption that the chloral hydrate was administered BEFORE Mr. Hilton was shot is correct.

What about the normal shading of the face, doc? Because that appears to have been greatly maximized.

One supposes Speed might have gotten this information over the phone but perhaps he wanted to show Jim Headquarters, which is, after all, where Speed is from.

Then they dash BACK to the hotel that may or may not be named "Hilton".

"Give the speed at which I operate, I have a hunch my intial search was cursory and shoddy!"

Sure enough, Speed finds something that the previous investigation did not reveal.

Do you think maybe Mr. Hilton LIVED at the hotel? That's a thing that used to happen in those days, before they invented condos.

Surely, if Jim was able to tell at a glance his father's coffee cups, he'll be able to identify whether this is his father's diamond bag. And, yes, traditinally, jewelers DID use small leather pouches for carrying jewels. Probably a medieval thing.

Drumroll, please...

MH: Mr. Hilton

Hm. So the pouches belongs to... someone else?  Another diamond merchant?  Elias Brent, we can assume? But this line of reasoning is cut short by the arrival of a stranger in the doorway!

"Wuh-ellll,  ya got trouble my friends, right here in Saunders City!
Trouble with a capital T and that rhymes with C and that stands for CHLORAL!"

I'm glad he introduced himself or I might have thought THIS one was Nikola Tesla.   This dandy fresh off the Rock Island Line is here as a Useful Male Informant.  I don't believe I caught his name, but I don't believe he dropped it.  Surely Mr. Secretary will provide us useful information!

... Wait. 
Wait.
I... what? WTH?

Brent didn't TAKE the diamond from Hilton; HE BROUGHT IT TO HIM.

...

Let me try to understand. 

Brent had a diamond in his possession worth between $10 million and $25 million (in today's dollars), which he brings FROM Europe TO Saunders City to Hilton's room (which may or may not be at the Hilton).  Then, um... Hilton goes DOWN to Brent's room on the floor below-- BRINGING TWO OF HIS OWN COFFEE CUPS-- and they ... have coffee in Brent's room (411)?  Then they... go back UP to 511, where, um... Hilton zonks out, chloralized by the coffee, giving Brent the opportunity to shoot him in the head and put the gun in the corpse's hand (because you could totally get away with that stuff in the day).   Then he left and used tweezers (every diamong merchant has them) to turn the inside key and lock the door.

Okay, MAYBE all this simply happened in Room 511 and... and Brent TOOK THE CUPS to his room afterwards because he knew the chloral in one of them could be detected if found by the police.  Sure, I can believe that but...

if he HAD the diamond, what was the point of KILLING HILTON?!  And then selling a $10-25 million diamond to a cruddy local fence for what, five thousand bucks?  And if Hilton has never had the diamond, WHY CALL IT THE HILTON DIAMOND?!* This makes no sense at all.

NO, SPEED, IT IS DOES NOT MAKE SENSE AND NOW MATTER HOW LONG YOU STARE AT ME IT WON'T CHANGE THAT.

Speed prepares to arrest everyone within a one-mile radius.

"Don't I need to, you know, be some sort of officer to get a warrant from Headquarters?"
"Of course not, Jim. Just tell them I sent you; I'm from there.

Tomorrow: Speed gets to the bottom of this mystery. Kind of. Without a warrant.

*This does, I suppose, lend credence to those scholars who believe that the Hotel is ALSO named "Hilton".

Speed Saunders and the Hilton Diamond, 3: The Trail Gets Warm!

Yesterday, we left as The Biggest Diamond Merchant in Europe, Elias Brent (a.k.a., "Mr. Brandon") was pumping bullets in Speed and Jim with a forty-five, one-handed, bent-armed, and with no noise-protection.  How very European!

But of course the bullets completely miss Speed and Jim!

Oh.
Ow. Ow ow.
I may have spoken a bit too soon.

Well. That's embarassing.

Given that there was one Bang, one Bam, and one Boom, we can presume that Brent/Brandon shot at least three times in what apparently must be described as a Withering Blast of Bullets, after which Speed and Jim fell to the floor. So... they simply MUST be dead.

NOPE; JUST FLESH WOUNDS.

Of course; I should have realized that no mere bullet would dare harm Speed Saunders, not even at close range.  Besides Brent is a European who obviously doesn't know how to handle a forty-five.  Speed, through sheer force of will and in the interest of time, manifests a Viennese-style doctor to treat the wounds (they are European wounds, after all). Speed explains his presence and Brent, who recognizes Speed because everyone recognizes Speed, simply apologizes and toddles off, despite having just SHOT someone From Headquarters.

"I shoot a lot of people, you see; it's already in my budget."

Jim, playing audience surrogate, helps us realize that Speed was just trying to fool Brent/Brandon about Jim's father's death being a suicide.

"Jeez, Jim, how stupid ARE you?  I'm unadopting you."

Fortunately, although not even fully out of the room, Brent can't hear their plan, probably because he wasn't hearing ear protection when he fired a forty-five. They've got to follow him (which you can't do by tesseracting or shadow-traveling) so they take a taxi.

Okay, Jim, the son of a diamond merchant; exactly how and why do you know that Darnell is a fence for stolen goods?

Then Speed says something that no other English-speaker has ever said.

Trails only get cold, Speed; they do not "get warm". That is not how English works. Or entropy.

Speed, obviously thinking that Brent/Brandon stole a diamond from Jim's father before murdering him and has just sold it to Darnell The Fence, goes to test his theory.

Have you notice that no one has questioned why Brent is traveling under an assumed name? Or is that just something that European Diamond Merchants do on the regular, for security reasons?

I am eager to see how Speed approaches this interview. "Hi, Darnell; have you recently fenced any stolen diamonds? I'm from Headquarters."

I can already tell this interview will not go well.

Tomorrow: the intervew does not go well!

Speed Saunders and the Hilton Diamond 2: Getting the 411!

When last we left Speed (and his new tagalong, "Jim", Son of Corpse), he was following up on a hunch (as he often does).

"Later"?  Is this the Hunch Following or AFTER the Hunch Following?  Even a veteran of Speed Saunders stories such as I has trouble holding on as the plot roars along at breakneck Speed.

Pause for a moment to appreciate the worldliness of Speed Saunders, who recognizes by sight the Biggest Diamond Merchant in Europe, Elias Brent.  As well as the natural Ace Investigator skills his sidekick is quickly acquiring. 

"HAVE HIS STOMACH PUMPED!"  

"Let's not rush things, Jim..."

I guess it helps that Brent is DRESSED European; the bowler, the wing collar, the cravate, the carnation, the dress gloves.  If he had a mustache I'd assume he was Nikola Tesla, just coming back to his hotel from feeding the pigeons.

Also, Nik didn't have a scar (thanks to those big rubber shoes he worn in the lab).

You know what used to be VERY easy back in the day, before credit cards? Lodging under an assumed name. It happens all the time in old movies.

A diagonal scar? I thought he just had well-defined cheekbones. Well, such is Golden Age art.

Turns out Mr. Brent is posing as... MR. BRANDON. Whatever that means.

Note this part of the panel very well:

You see, Room 411 is located directly BELOW Room 511; it's a plot point and this panel foreshadows that.  Such is Golden Age art!

Next we get one of my favorite Speed Saunders quotes, one that I use myself all the time:

"I'm from Headquarters."

Headquarters? Headquarters of what? It doesn't matter; of EVERYTHING.  Whatever the relevant authority is, Speed is from its Headquarters.  

Speed and Jim go to 411 for some information.

For those who keep track of such things; this bellhop may be the only black person in a Speed Saunders story.  

Where Speed discovers the most non-descript generic coffee cups imaginable.

Which Jim somehow manages to immediately and unquestionably identify as belonging to his father.  Maybe that's his dad's lipstick? 

I think "generic" undersells it; these are the very instantiations of the Platonic Ideal of Coffee Cup.

This story, by the way, is in the exact period when melamine cups and dishes were being popularized among American consumers.  Jim's dad was HIP.

Before we, the readers, can even think of asking, "Who on earth TRAVELS with their own coffee cups?!", Speed focuses on some... napkins? Wax paper? Receipts?  Proto-postit notes?  Lipstick blotters? Who can tell?

WHAT ARE THEY GOOD FOR, SPEED, TELL US QUICKLY BEFORE--

SUDDENLY A SHOT RINGS OUT!

Okay, fine; NOW I can tell it's a scar.

Thus did the Biggest Diamond Merchant in Europe, Elias Brent (whom we are apparently now calling by his pseudonym, "Brandon") shoot both Speed and Jim to death, may they rest in peace.  Don't mess with the Antwerp mafia!

Tomorrow: We pay our final respects to Speed Saunders (and his sidekick, Jim).

Speed Saunders and the Hilton Diamond, 1: A Locked Room Mystery

 Meanwhile, in Detective #18, we find:

We join this episode of Speed Saunders, already in progress!

Yes, this is the first panel.  Speed has work to do and can't wait around for you to catch up.

Who is the corpse? Who's the non-chalant blond kid?  Does getting a chemical report involve stomach-pumping?  Who knows! It's Speed Saunders, just run with it...

So, the blond kid nonchalantly staring at the corpse is the corpse's son.  But, because English has no clear way to distinguish between an appositive and a vocative, it's perfectly ambiguous whether Jim is name of the corpse or of the corpse's son. Or both.

Something big and dangerous, Speed? Like.... a bear? Do you think the diamond merchant was shot by a bear?  Or maybe a talking gorilla, like the one you fought before?  Curious to see where this hunch takes you!

Turns out, this is a "locked room" mystery.

"He entertained someone?"
"Sorry to have to break it to you, kid, but... 
your father was a veritable strumpet."

"Your father was not ready for bed." He looks pretty ready to me, Speed. He's wearing a robe and lying in bed.  But if he did commit suicide, would he really "get ready for bed" first?  Pretty sure that's not a thing suicides do. "Must remember to set the alarm before I shoot myself; wouldn't want to oversleep!"

Speed, however, is not some methodical fanciful fop like Hercule Poirot; Speed is an active action-oriented fop.  As such, Speed does not have time or patience for "locked room" mysteries and so dismisses THAT part IMMEDIATELY.

There was a time when you needed a key to lock a door from the inside, as weird as that now seems.  That's the time Speed lives in.

Jim -- or is it Jim Junior? -- is disconsolate.  Having lost his father, in his despair he naturally chooses Speed as a role model and immediately starts to look like him.

In mere moments, Jim Junior's transformation into Speed Junior is nearly complete.

Speed Junior would later become a founding member of the Teen Ace Investigators, along with Slap Bradley, Denise Colt, and Coco, Maid of Disguise.

Speed has a hunch!  Let's see how THAT turns out...

JuJuBit Profile: The Penny Plunderer

Naturally, I had to make myself a special sculpt of Joe Coyne, the Penny Plunderer, who is the epitome of a one-shot Golden Age thematic villain and source of the Batcave's Giant Penny. Honestly, who DOESN'T love the Penny Plunderer?

Sigh. I really DO deserve to get a better digital camera.

The sculpt was created on JuJuBit using this pic:

As I've said before, it's a crying shame that John Astin played The Riddler on Batman'66, when Joe Coyne is so clearly the part he was born to play.

I already have a previous Joe Coyne custom Heroclix, so I needed a new dial for the new sculpt.  I wanted a dial that would be a useful support piece rather than a strong one that could successfully take on Batman as a team centerpiece.

Because taking on Batman didn't turn out very well for Joe.

I specifically wanted him to be a useful assistant for Two-Face, Batman's (MUCH) more prominent coin-related villain.  So I chose the one dial almost perfectly designed (unintentionally, I assume) as a complement to Two-Face: 

The Gambler has TWO "coin-flipping" mechanics handy, one of which lets Two-Face re-do a coin flip (and Two-Face figures almost always have some sort of mechanic that depends on a coin flip).  Giving Two-Face a second chance whenever he flips a coin to do something in the game can be a very useful ability, indeed!

Once I "rebrand" this dial, it looks like this:

He doesn't naturally have the "Batman Enemy Team Ability" but he does have the "Team Player" Team ability (that's the question mark in the circle) that allows him to copy the Team Abilities of other friendly figures.  That lets him "borrow" the Batman Enemy TA from another figure (such as Two-Face).  His regular powers, without going into detail about them are general about be fast-acting, sneaky, and LUCKY (or unlucky, as the case may be), which is not a bad match with the Penny Plunderer.

His 'coin-re-flipping' power might also come in handy if I play him with the actual Giant Penny.

I'm not sure the Giant Penny would really be helpful, but it sure would feel good thematically.!