Wednesday, November 19, 2014


...from my new comics/media.

  • Lex can accidentally develop a virus that gives people temporary random superpowers, but ONLY affects humans?
  • While the Joker can, during his downtime, develop a version of Joker venom that affects Superman and Wonder Woman and Flash, all of whose physiologies regularly reject such things?
  • And makes them -- with bizarre specificity -- feel like attacking Batman?
  • While growing a new face and moonlighting as an orderly without Batman recognizing him?
  • And, meanwhile, Lex can't even cure his sister's paralysis?
  • Am I the only person who thinks that the next time we see the Penguin in comics he just be an older version of the one from Gotham, who's been world's more successful in capturing the public's imagination than any version since Burgess Meredith's?
  • Hey, Wonder Woman; how bad is it when AQUAMAN tells you you're too prone to throwing a punch?
  • Is it really that hard to write Wonder Woman by just asking yourself "Would Lynda Carter do this?" every time you write a scene?
  • Anyone else confused as to why Swamp Thing would be even be a suspect?
  • Or how the League can't tell that WATER wiped out a village, particularly since there's a broken dam nearby?
  • Or why the scene at the dam felt like I was flashbacking on Avatar?
  • Wouldn't YOU have moved the statue-that-used-to-be-your-mother into a safer place? Is there no U-Store-It on Paradise Island?
  • If for no other reason than... aren't there any BIRDS on Paradise Island?
  • Does Harlan Ellison not like Robin, given how incompetent he made him in Batman '66?
  • Is there anything more disturbing than the Penguin taking DEEP whiffs of your underwear?
  • Shouldn't Harvey Dent be handsomer than that?
  • Cisco Ramon, are there no barbers in Central City?!
  • What kind of jerk DOES buy a yellow humvee, anyway?
  • Would Eddie Thawne be that *ahem* 'sexy' if they let him wear clothes that fit?
  • Have you EVER wanted to see anyone successfully hit a little girl in the face more?! I mean, OTHER than "Cat" on Gotham?
  • P.S. Your friends do not call you "Cat"; you call you  "Cat". Do you even have any friends?
  • Why do half the characters in Central City talk with NYC accents?
  • Except for Iris, who's from the Valley?
  • You wanted to see Barry drop Iris off the roof, too, didn't you?
  • And then travel back in time to do the same thing to Barbara Keane in Gotham?
  • So, Det. Eddie Thawne is substantially less bright than a kid wearing earbuds?
  • Why did Barry sit up just to deliver one line, only to lie back down immediately?
  • Since child-Barry says "gawt" and adult-Barry says "gaht'h" are we just not supposed to notice they have completely different accents, or does lightning give you abs AND a NYC accent?
  • Exactly WHY is it so important that no one in Central City know that their town is now crawling with metahuman villains?  
  • And isn't it awfully conveniently that every single one of them waited until Barry came out of his nine-month coma to start using their powers?
  • I wasn't surprised they altered Girder's origin, were you?
  • Were there an awful lot of people doing improbable things are the same moment the particular accelerator blew up?
  • If you were the Flash, entering a dark place, wouldn't you take four seconds to set up about a thousand flash-lights?
  • Was there some reason Flash didn't just hit Girder by THROWING something at him at Mach 1.3? Because you can throw something a LOT faster than you can run, you know.
  • Or just... dropping him in the very nearby river?  Because turning to steel doesn't really help you there.
  • Oh, yeah, dude; revealing your secret identity to a deadly superfoe who you now have to keep in solitary confinement for the rest of his life was... totally worth the incredible risk to you and everyone you know...?!
  • Was anyone else TERRIFIED by the end of The Flash?

Sunday, November 02, 2014

The Penguin for a new generation

I have heard some complaints about the Robin Lord Taylor version of the Penguin  on the television show "Gotham" as being insufficiently canonical.

For example...

Kind of skinny, isn't he?

But then again...

so was Burgess Meredith, the man who defined the Penguin for at least one generation.

Killing someone for a sandwich?  How could the Penguin be so vicious!

However, the Penguin is probably...

more cold-blooded than you remember.

He's rather fey, isn't it?  Hardly seems appropriate.

Then again....

the Penguin was never what you'd call "macho".

He's so ...pathetic.  He hardly seems threatening at all!

Then again.

that was part of made him originally so successful.

Ugh, the Penguin as some low-level mob flunky? How undignified!

Then again....

being an apparent pushover not taken by seriously by "real" gangster is part of his origin.

Why is he cooperating with the police? That's completely un-Penguin-like!

Except,of course,

for every time it suits his purpose.

No, "Gotham"'s version of Penguin is just fine, thank you.