Sunday, October 07, 2007


Yesterday at Big Monkey, we had the third of the five legs of the Starro tournament series. Starro; five legs. I love that.

Anyway, there were sixteen players and Rambo took pictures of some of them so that I could "convert" them into goon pogs.

The Punk Kid is Big Mike Pellegrino, who beat me today by 8 points. Not that I'm bitter, mind you. I only picked him for the Punk Kid because of his baby face and his pose. Not because he beat me. By 8 points. Which is four times what his pog is now worth.

The weaselly Gunsel is, of course, Dr. Ben Hatton, host of the Big Monkey Podcast. Note the Stealth (the dial's based on the superstitious and cowardly Joe Chill).

Can't you just picture Ben, cowering behind potted plants, with a little pearl-handed
22 in his trembling hands? Ah, well; the customers have gotten used to it... .

The Scrapper is that pugnacious Irishman, Jon Carey, who writes (and spends his Friday nights) Facedown in the Gutters.

Note that John has Leap/Climb so he can run away from whomever he insulted most recently on the Big Monkey Podcast. Or when someone whom I insulted decides to attack Jon instead.

If you think Chris Peleo-Lazar, the Enforcer, looks mobbed up, that's because he is. His roommate sells cement overshoes for a living, if you catch my drift.

The Hoodlum is supposedly Joe Kroc, but I've always suspected that's some sort of anagramatic assumed named, forced on him after he turned State's Evidence.

Gabe is the smooth Con Man (whose stats I borrowed from Space Phantom). His glib tongue can convince you not to attack him (Shape Change) and his fast-talking can keep you fixated on him (Elasticity).

PJ Rusk is the Accomplice, sinking deeper and deeper in the depravity of underground heroclix clubs. I find it so sad. Profitable, but sad.

Steve is the Bruiser, and bruise me he did during our first game yesterday. But I would have won, if the judge had let me cheat. Darn it. That's okay. Now the judge doesn't get a pog. But I'm not bitter.

The Tough Guy, with the Toughness to go with the title, is none other than Jonnie Hex of Jon Hex Lives and the Big Monkey Podcast. Jonnie always looks as if he's about to shank you or buy you a Courvoisier; nothing in between.

The Innocent Dupe is Mick, a.k.a. Superman's Pal. But in that picture, he looks like just the kind of person a deformed psychopath could convince to help break into the Gotham Gold Depository.

And Yonaton plays the role of Fodder, those indispensably dispensable goons you throw at Batman and Robin while you make good your escape. Have you noticed that Fodder are always male? Do they have female counterparts who work for supervillainesses, and are they called Mudder?

In case you didn't recognize him in the cap, Judo Guy is our local judo student, Brandon Hallmark III. When your name is Brandon Hallmark III, I guess you kind of have to study judo just to stay alive.

Judo Kid is actually "Judo" Kiet. Like Judo Guy, he's got Combat Reflexes, so if you're going to try to hit him, better do so from a distance.

Of course, the worst goon of all -- almost a full-fledged villain in his own right-- is the devious, insidious Pusher.

He acts swiftly to get you hooked on plastic crack. He knows he's got Willpower, but you don't... .

"Sure, kid; you can have a booster. The first one's free...!"


The Kid from Jersey said...

The innocent dupe would be Mick. I played him in the last game, and learned Superman is almost untouchable.

Scipio said...

Mick; that's right.

Which one are you?!

Jon Hex said...

Judo Kid is Kiet.

The Kid from Jersey said...

I just want to see if you can guess first, with two hints: I'm in college and I could write villian dialog very well, because of heroclix

Nate said...

So friggin awesome to be able to complete my Big Monkey set. Officers Garling and Sanders are sure gonna have their hands full. Not that they were ever able to touch The Lieutenant!

Anonymous said...

I'd like to make Mick the Innocent Dupe not so innocent. Woot! What a cutie.

Scipio said...

"I'm in college "

I didn't think there was anyone 20 y.o. playing. Kiet?

Devon Sanders said...

OK, these are hilarious.

Anonymous said...

Isn't Heroclix now defunct? I bought a booster from the latest set and it was so poorly made (a major regression in sculpting and production) that I figured it was the last gasp of a dying game. As in, going the way of Mage Knight. Am I wrong?

Scipio said...

LOL, very wrong! I assume you bought from a Marvel set; there always seem to be some problems with those. DC seems to be fussier.

Everyone I know thinks the sets are better than ever! Heroclix has really taken off at our stores at the company that makes them have redirected their marketing more toward comic book lovers (rather than just game guys). It's pulling in all those of us who've never played such a "miniature" game before, but who love the characters the Heroclix figures represent.

Games like MageKnight aren't really based on anything in particular; the characters are ad hoc, and as soon as fickle gameplayers get distracted by the next shiny game, it ends.

But Heroclix's audience is comic book fans, not just gamers. We follow characters forever. Every figure in Heroclix is a character already, one with fans. Even Halo.

mando said...

man, i never knew jon carey was so cute. between him and scipio, it's a good thing i don't live in d.c.

The Kid from Jersey said...

I love that people always think I'm older than I actually...except at bars where it actually name starts with a S Scip

The Kid from Jersey said...

Oh yeah, changed my display name from njp8baller to something more descriptive

PJ said...

I have now been immortalized as a pog. Wow. Just wow. I never thought I'd be able to check that off the list.