Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Haikuesday: JJ and the Bear

We all know that J'onn J'onzz's Justice League Detroit had repeated trouble with bears.

I think it was J'onn's fault;

Bears do not like J'onn, and vice versa.

Let's see.... at this point each of those thousand dollar bills is worth an equivalent $6500 current dollars, each of which will then feed a homeless person (or, as we called them then, a "bum") for at least-- well, let's just say J'onn's impromptu wealth distribution scheme here is going make for a lot of happy hoboes in Apex.

Ordinarily, I'd guess that this is just Mother Earth rejecting the presence of an extraterrestial alien like the Martian Manhunter, hoping to destroy him by spewing forth chthonic monstrous ursines to attack him (under the guise of a bank robbery). But, sadly, this is no uprising of Nature against the Unnatural; it's just another average bank robbery in Apex:
Wouldn't you like to have been at that gang meeting? "Well, yes... we could knock over that filling station while wearing stocking caps... or we could.. build a giant mechanical bear and use it to rob the bank while we're inside it wearing suits and ties! All in favor...?" I'll say this for the denizens of Apex's underworld; they've got a zest for fun and clearly think of crime as some sort of avant garde performance art.

Even JJ himself is overwhelmed by the Silver Age lunacy of it all...

The Apexians, being more used to stupidity than J'onn, observe it all with a placidity that still leaves them able to comment on it in haiku:
Look! The bear's leaping
off with an armful of one
thousand dollar bills!

Why haiku can you compose to celebrate the madness of the giant mechanical bear?


Rich said...

Giant robot bear
Robbing banks, fighting Martians
All without tutu

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

J'onn fights a big bear
That's trying to rob the bank
Apexans just shrug

Mike Loughlin said...

I call it "Only in Apex"

The bear thinks he's won.
He got the cash, beat J'Onn J'Onzz...
Meteors crush bear.

Reno said...

If they had the money to build a giant robot bear, why do they need to rob banks?