The Impossible Inventions, Part 2

When last we left Apex City, Detective John Jones had just confiscated wealthy wannabe inventor Hiram Horner's paint spray gun cum hand-held molecular explosion ray, while assuming that meant the city was safe for a while.

Does J'onn sweat? Or is it just "John" who sweats? It really doesn't pay to think too hard about the Martian Manhunter.

And technically he is correct; the city IS safe for a while: less than 24 hours. Because the next day...

The VERY next day, in fact.

Why, it's Hiram Horner, armed with another hand-held device.  Perhaps it's an automatic cheese-slicer that, when it malfunctions, becomes an inter-dimensional reality-slicer, opening up rifts allowing the invasion of unimaginable horrors from a hell-dimension.  That would be par for the course in an MM story.  Eh; it can't be THAT bad.  The exploding statues were certainly scary for those flocking nearby but it's not like Hiram's little FUBARs are going to affect a wide area.

OH, NO--!

What th--?! "Remote-controlled airborne building transporter"? What is THAT supposed to mean?

How? Just..., just how?

Boy, I bet Buckminster Fuller wishes he'd thought of THAT.  Look, I know that some of Apex City's "skyscrapers" are oddly small, but (as Buckminster Fuller said), "have you ever really considered how much your buildings actually WEIGH?"  Hiram, at least, should know because (one presumes) he must OWN that building and have calculated the amount of thrust required to make it fly through the air.  I can also tell you there is NO WAY Horner has a permit to fly a building downtown, so he is in BIG trouble with the newly-founded FAA.

To say nothing of the WITHERING review that Dominic Magenta, unveiling critic for the Daily Clarion, has ALREADY begun to pen in his mind.

Messy logistics and legalities aside, Horner has an AMAZING and potentially very profitable invention on his hands. As long as nothing goes wrong.

I'd be coughing, too, if I smoked that much.

Oh, it's a "model" building! Well, that's... different? No, I have no idea what that means, other than implying there's no one inside it and that it was constructed solely for the purpose of Horner's demonstration.  It might mean it's just some hollow mock-up and so weighs less than a regular  building, but then it wouldn't really be much of a demonstration, now, would it? "Watch me lift this enormous barbell, made of paper maché" isn't much of a sideshow attraction.

Well, clearly MM has to do SOMETHING because, as usual, hordes of Apexians are flocking right below, gawking, because that's just what they do. And who can blame them? You'd probably gawk if you saw a floating building, too.

So, J'onn says that there is only ONE way to solve the situation. Is it:

a. Using his ultra-powerful Martian breath to blow the building out of the way?

b. Using super-speed to push the flock of Apexians out of the way?

c. Using Martian-vision to vaporize the model building into unthreatening dust? 

or

d. Spinning?

LET'S FIND OUT!

Dude, if passing cops can SEE Mr. Moth inside the mothcopter atop a skyscraper, then they can definitely see you atop an airborne building.

What the heck is J'ONN going to do up there?

I... what?

Is firm-rooftop-anchoring a previously unmentioned Martian power?  Whatever, J'onn; just do whatever you want because we know where "propeller blades" is headed:

SPINNING.

I REALLY want to see an animated version of this. Does he keep spinning his top half in one direction while his bottom half remains motionless and if so HOW CREEPY IS THAT?

J'onn's done some ridiculous stunts, like allowing cars to drive over his giganticized butt in the absence of a bridge, but this one is uniquely improbable.  

Naturally, realizing that Hiram Honer is a thousand times more threatening to public safety than escaped convict Willy Ward, J'onn J'onzz the Martian Manhunter, in his earth guise as Detective John Jones, arrests the hapless inventor, who then languishes in jail for the rest of his natural life.

Or he lightly scolds him as Horner is distracted by J'onn's ridiculous stunt. 

I guess the one thing J'onn can be grateful for is that none of Horner's exploding/falling fiascos are on fire!

Tomorrow: Hiram Horner instigates multiple exploding falling fiascos on fire.