The Greatest of them All

Many's the villain who has had a private name that turned out to be exceptionally fitted to their eventual villainous identity.

Rocky Grimes (who became, uh, Rocky Grimes) is a mild example, since the hook is just his first name (which is obviously just a nickname, anyway). 

Subtle as a brick Rocky had a way of really FORCING the connections to this theme.

Joe Coyne (who became the Penny Plunderer) is a bit stronger, being his last name.  

But, given another set of circumstances, Joe might have become, say, a coffee-themed villain, The Java Robber.

Edward ("E.)" Nigma is delightful because it just COULD be a normal name and doesn't seem odd unless you use the first initial.  Sadly, later writers would change "Nigma" to "Nygma", which I suppose they thought was more realistic because it was less on point.  At one point, one writer (Denny O'Neil) decided even that was too silly and posited that his REAL real name was "Eddie Nashton".

And god forbid Serious Writer Denny O'Neil do anything silly.

Julian Day (Calendar Man) is extremely on point, of course, but that name was a retcon. In his original appearance he HAD no "real name"; he was a magician named "the Maharajah"..

With a really strong dental plan.

Harley Quinn is an example similar to Calendar Man.  When she was first introduced (BTAS "Joker's Favor"), she was completed unnamed.  Only during a subsequent appearance was she given the codename "Harley Quinn". It was even later she was given a backstory (which definitely contradicted her first appearance, where she was a self-confessed beauty school drop-out, rather than a psychotherapist) and the birth name of "Harleen Quinzel" (because it is NOT easy to reverse engineer a name like "Harley Quinn").  I assume it was partly in honor of her original voice actor, Arleen Sorkin.

For a few precious years, Harley Quinn's first appearance was the most destructive thing that had ever happened on September 11.

But in yesterday's post, we caught a glimpse of the greatest of these characters, hands-down.  Oh, sure, everyone is quick to proffer "Roy G. Bivolo" as the greatest example of the prophetic name phenomenon.

His air of confidence helps.

But the real champion is this guy:

Richie Rich foe, Dr. N-R-Gee

Dr. N-R-Gee is ALSO probably the greatest objected-headed villain of all time, but that's obvious.  Now, you might think that his original identity was some name with the initials "NRG" because, well, I mean what ELSE would it be?

We found out differently when his origin story was finally told in Richie Rich Money World #16 (1972).

You may recall its dramatic cover on the spinner racks.

It involved an unfortunate accident with a electric head-scratcher.

Yes, Dr. R-N-Gee did this scene BEFORE Jack Nicholson's Joker.

Before he became an object-headed supervillain, Dr. R-N-Gee was a brilliant engineer named

PHIL LAMENT.

And THAT, ladies and gentlemen, has been, is, and will always be the ultimate prophetic villain name.

The Green Arrow Blacklist

Having listed yesterday what I consider some prime candidates for re-entry into Green Arrow's rogues gallery, I want to balance it with a list of villains who should NOT be brought back.

1. The Cat

Really? "Look, a mouse?"  smh.  Be better, Golden Age.

Look, Bull's-Eye vis-à-vis the Joker is one thing. But a female villain in a dark cat costume, named "The Cat"? No; absolutely not.

2.  The Question Mark

Despite his name, the villain wasn't ACTUALLY Riddler-like at all. 

He's colorblind and has weak ankles; he is remarkably unimpressive. 
Even for a Green Arrow villain.

But the name is still a disqualifier.  Even if he weren't a feeb hiding out among the staff at a Green Arrow -themed hotel.

3.  The Skylark

The Skylark was actually a villain who appeared more than once, which argues strongly for updating him.  But...

This may seem odd to say about a supervillain, but...
this guy is weird.

A bird-themed villain with a prophetic given name? Urk.  If we "approve" him (or these others), Green Arrow's Rogues Gallery starts to look like Bob Kane and Al Brodax developed them.

We all remember Cool McCool,  don't we?

You COULD argue the opposite. That these villains seeming like Batman villain knock-offs could work in their FAVOR. You could lean into it and have them be conscious imitators of the Gotham originals; it would make them a deliciously painful embarrassment for Ollie, who is sensitive about being a Batman knockoff.

4.  The Wind

Now, at first glance, you'd think I would be 100% behind The Wind (World's Finest #38.)

Nothing says "confidence" like wearing a weathervane on your head.

He looks like a Doom Patrol villain.  But he's barely a villain at all. He's just an arrow-obsessed zillionaire who fakes being a villain so he can *sigh* add Green Arrow's arrows to his collection.

"It is also the ONLY collection of arrows in the world, because arrow-collecting is NOT a thing."

I'm SURE he could have just hired Bull's-Eye to get him some.  Yer a poseur, Wind.  And you could tell his heart wasn't really in it.

How do you FAIL to say
"Run like The Wind!"
under these circumstances?
smh again.

5. Homer Lampe

Really, what else would you expect?

Homer Lampe was a scientist of the "They laughed at me and my inventions! Well, I'll show THEM!" type.

This is what the world was like before GoFundMe.

Naturally, he turns his inventions to crime.

Specifically, pickpocketing facilitated by hypnotic lights.
Crime was a LOT easier where people still had CASH.

Okay, points for the appropriately villainous use of "Confound!", but this guy is no Dr. Light.

What on earth are you going to do with a mink scarf?  Take it to a consignment shop?

He takes no codename (then again, where can you go from "Mr. Lampe"?).  He devises no costume.

Even though he definitely had some easy options.

Then once he's caught, he goes all GOODY-GOOD just because someone shows him some RESPECT.

BAH! Confound you, Green Arrow, and Star City's advanced techniques of penology.

What good is a someone who becomes a villain to gain respect then becomes a not-villain when he gains it?  

6. St Louis Louie

Oh, you remember him; he's the guy who took on the three lieutenant Arrows (Fat Arrow, Tall Arrow, and Hillbilly Arrow).

He also looks DISTURBINGLY like Ally Babble.

Time has been kind to the Batman mythos.
VERY kind.

This is the pinnacle of St. Louis Louie's career and always will be:

He's the man who almost killed Green Arrow by bouncing an empty revolve off his empty skull.

Any additional appearances or attempts to revitalize him would pale in comparison to that one perfect moment.

7. Greenface

Exists there a sadder excuse for a villain than Greenface?

He looks like the Composite Humphrey Bogart / Don Knotts.

His origin is so absurd -- some industrial dye blew up in his face, permanently discoloring it-- that they refused to depict it on-panel.

Any villain whose origin is THAT stupid is clearly marked as Z-grade, permanently.

He talks like a thug, droppin' his Gs and talkin' 'bout Dis and Dat.  The Joker may have the same stupid origin, but the Joker wouldn't hire someone that inarticulate even as a disposable goon.

Even Rocky Grimes was more eloquent.

His only shown crime is making off with some gold leaf his gang managed to SCRAPE off the walls of a museum.

Pathetic.  Might as well fish coins out of a public fountain or mug a pencil-selling blind man.

Which he then has to waste on some pipe-dream of getting in the Criminal Hall of Fame by killing Green Arrow.

"Corny" isn't the word I'd use, Greenface.  I see why they gave you a green face;
it's the only way to tell you apart from your own goons.

Even Greenface's delusions of grandeur are pathetic ones:

I think this would even sadden Killer Moth, and HE's got an EMPTY Hall of Trophies.

Face it, Greenface; you'll never reach the exalted status of someone like The Flag:

It's actually rather sad that there is only ONE Green Arrow villain in the Criminal Hall of Fame.  No justice for St. Louis Louie!

And then, like an ultimate putz, you STAB YOURSELF in the process of fleeing from Green Arrow.

Where is Rocky Grimes when we need him?

Then it manages to get WORSE.

I mean, REALLY, though. What kind of Z-grade imbecile stabs HIMSELF nearly-fatally while trying to get away from the good guy?

Because the Greenface does an Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge bit (*sigh* or The Squid, if you are not well enough read) and imagines himself framing Green Arrow for his murder, leading to his triumphant ghost exulting at his inclusion in the Criminal Hall of Fame.

I wish he had died, because the GHOST of Greenface might be a viable character.

Goober that he is, he couldn't even die properly.  

You just know they waited there HOURS for him to wake up, simply so that they could rub it in.  The archers are petty people, with a lot of time on their be-gloved hands.

What kind of idiot can't even die right?

Ten Knaves for a Queen

Once again, Sholly Fisch said it best.

Green Arrow's latest foe in his title is The Crimson Archer,  a cleverly refurbished villain from his Golden Age.  A lot of what ails the green-arrowverse is rooted in his having a weak rogues gallery, so it makes me wonder who else deserves this sort of restoration.  Here are my ten top candidates!

1. Bull's-Eye

Clearly I feel this way, since I'm Bull's-Eye's number one (and possibly only still-living) fan. 

Obviously it would have to be a new Bull's-Eye, since the original one would be long dead.  Unless, hm, let's see...

UNLESS Per Degaton was angry that Ollie's encounter with Alexander the Great changed him to the champion of democracy who won the Battle of Arbela (which, as we know, undid Degaton's first attempt to rule the world).  

Because the most essential characteristic of Per Degaton is that he's a ****.

So, to get back at Green Arrow (in a very roundabout, Degatonic way), he... brought all of Ollie's foes BACK TO THE FUTURE to bedevil him.  Which would explain how so many of them simply vanished without resolution.  Geoff Johns, get cracking!

In the Golden Age, the fact that Bull's-Eye was a Joker rip-off was a downside to the character. But nowadays it could be hilariously lampshaded, with the Joker being the old-school villain's biggest fan (I would happily defer to the Joker). Maybe Joker would even bankroll him, just because watching Bull's-Eye annoy Green Arrow is the best entertainment money can buy. 

2.  The Red Devils

Of Gayland fame.

Easy enough to reinvent these criminal acrobats as a pesky parkouring street gang who form part of the criminal backdrop of Star City.  Star City deserves some local color to help contextualize Green Arrow, and the Red Devils would certainly count as that.

3.  Professor Angel

Sure, his original schtick of giving professionals ugly plastic surgery makeovers to blackmail them into aiding his crimes is... well, let's be kind and just call it "unsustainably elaborate". 

Nevertheless, a criminal plastic surgeon is a useful concept. Batman's world doesn't make enough use of the Crime Doctor, so Dr. Angel might as well occupy this niche for Green Arrow.

4.  The Sea Scourge

From Adventure #134.

Now, this isn't the same pirate guy (Captain Kilgore) we memorably saw Green Arrow flail against. But I'm all for a Pirate of Penzance Villain for Ollie's rogues gallery.  It fits in perfectly with Green Arrow's whole "Brave & Bold" background.  

5. The Flag

Oh, yes. The Flag (né Titus Flagsmith).

He CHOSE that outfit, you realize.

The Flag fought Green Arrow twice (Adventure #128 and 135) and he is a PIP.  He looks absurd; he's obsessed and homicidal; his theme is ridiculous and too narrow to be sustainable. He's the Signalman on cocaine. In short, he is Green Arrow's version of the Penny Plunderer.

I mean! The man makes MODELS of his intended crimes, like he's Doc Brown in "Back to the Future".  

For all these reasons, he is PERFECT candidate for revitalization as a (re-)new(ed) Green Arrow villain.  I have never written about the Flag before, but I'm beginning to think it may be incumbent upon me to do so as a public service.

6. The Roper

Exactly what it says on the tin.

Behold: The Roping Montage

The Roper (Adventure #178). He's stupid. He's rich, but still wants to be a criminal. His outfit is risible.  His schtick, based on a single, limited piece of equipment, is nonsense.  He lair is THE ROPE-CAVE, for god's sake.

He is the Green Arrow's Killer Moth.

In other words, he is the perfect foil for Green Arrow.  

7. The Crime Platoon

Sure, the idea of "criminals who operate like an army" has been done plenty of times.

Adventure #181.

But the Crime Platoon is SO literal about it and the Beagle Boys masks are too cute.  Plus, with their military stylings and strict discipline, they seem designed to irk Ollie the peacenik playboy.

8.  The Octopus

I don't think of him as a terrible supervillain.
I think of him as an outstanding and innovative performance artist.

Another no-brainer.  Every costumed crimefighter needs at least ONE thematically-obsessed semi-supervillain, and the Octopus is definitely the one that Ollie deserves, in any decade.

9. Prof. White, The Black Magician

Oh, yeah; this is the stuff!

Everybody deserves an evil magician as foe.  Usually they are smooth charming villains, but Prof. White is a raving madman.

An AGGRIEVED madman, who blames his misfortune on Green Arrow. 

"I hate you, too--hate you-- HATE YOU!"  It's nice to have a villain I can identify with, since I hate Green Arrow, too.  Prof. White has the colorfulness of a Flash villain and the insane bitterness of a Batman villain.  

You might say he lost his head.

This is exactly the kind of situation Green Arrow needs to be facing.

He's over-the-top, he's fun, he's a bitterly obsessed lunatic; what more could you want?

"DO
YOU
HEAR?"

10.  Blaze

Yeah, I know; fire villains are a dime a dozen.  But that's partly why I think Ollie needs one. 

That is one of comics' most awesome helmets, people.

Blaze never got a second outing, but his first one shows me he's got the stuff.

Fire in a crowded theater? Incendiary messenger pigeons?  You're a genius. Blaze!

He's not a mental defective like Flash's Heat Wave or an addled pyro like Batman's Firebug (or Firefly, if you are one of those modern readers who don't understand who Firefly REALLY was) or a weirdo like either of the two "Blazes" whom Batman fought. He's imposing and intelligent.

As well as fireproof and arrow-proof.

Which of these get YOUR vote?