Tuesday, November 08, 2005
One-Horned Haiku
Oh, dear; oh, my.
Ever since her creation by Marston, Wonder Woman has been bursting with symbolism. Well, this scene is a perfect example! Here, artistic license has even been taken with the unicorn's horn: instead of being a sharp spiraled cone with an icicle-like appearance, it's a thick shaft with a tapering head, kind of like a ... a rocket. Yes, it doesn't take a exegetical genius to see what that horn symbolizes:
the writer's pen.
You can feel the writer's struggle here. His metaphorical pen (as represented by the unicorn's horn) stabs toward haiku, poking at the muse of poetry (here personified by Wonder Woman), but missing every time, as the correct meter dodges, avoids, and evades him.
Then Wonder Woman cruelly laughs at his powerless projectile of poetry. "Hola!" she interjects meaninglessly. "You can't capture Wonder Woman with the paltry syllabification of a haiku! It requires pages and pages of paragraph after paragraph of wordy narration boxes: just ask George Perez or Phil Jimenez!"
Sadly, there's no way to parse this sequence's narration into a haiku, although it's so desperately needed to capture the moment!
Can you help out the writer by composing an appropriate haiku about Wonder Woman's successful evasion of the thrusting horn?
Labels: Haiku
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Suffering Sappho!
Where are your manners you cad?
Buy me a drink first!
What?! You're hard again?
Take less Viagra next time.
I can barely walk!
Hot damn Diana!
I have never had such great
Foreplay in my life!
Where are your manners you cad?
Buy me a drink first!
What?! You're hard again?
Take less Viagra next time.
I can barely walk!
Hot damn Diana!
I have never had such great
Foreplay in my life!
# posted by 
: 11/08/2005 3:53 AM
: 11/08/2005 3:53 AM
Giant phalluses,
Furry rape attacks, bondage
fantasies, lassos.
Marston must have been
First to write Wonder Woman
erotic fanfic.
Furry rape attacks, bondage
fantasies, lassos.
Marston must have been
First to write Wonder Woman
erotic fanfic.
Thrusting horn was not
Steve Trevor's idea of foreplay.
He liked to receive.
Hal goosed her and what
was Colonel Trevor's response?
He died! What a yutz.
Lois Lane or Steve
Trevor? Who is bigger yutz?
Jimmy Olson wins!
Steve Trevor's idea of foreplay.
He liked to receive.
Hal goosed her and what
was Colonel Trevor's response?
He died! What a yutz.
Lois Lane or Steve
Trevor? Who is bigger yutz?
Jimmy Olson wins!
Like a Minature Matador
The Daring Amazon skirts
Horny Impalement
With Uncanny Speed
She leaps out of the way as
The Horn Penetrates.
(A Unicorn will
Do a Hole in the Wall, and
Can Make it's own Hole.)
The Daring Amazon skirts
Horny Impalement
With Uncanny Speed
She leaps out of the way as
The Horn Penetrates.
(A Unicorn will
Do a Hole in the Wall, and
Can Make it's own Hole.)
This Wonder Woman #151 cover is kinda Haiku-ey
http://www.comics.org/graphics/covers/277/400/277_4_151.jpg
http://www.comics.org/graphics/covers/277/400/277_4_151.jpg
First from behind me!
Then, it's coming towards my face!
Climactic thrust! THUD!
By Hera, that's it?
The unicorn stopped, tired.
I crave more battle!
Then, it's coming towards my face!
Climactic thrust! THUD!
By Hera, that's it?
The unicorn stopped, tired.
I crave more battle!
# posted by : 11/09/2005 8:27 AM
: 11/09/2005 8:27 AM
"This Wonder Woman #151 cover is kinda Haiku-ey: http://www.comics.org/graphics/covers/277/400/277_4_151.jpg"
Wondy One-Five-One:
This was Wonder Girl's first tale?
She didn't exist!
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Wondy One-Five-One:
This was Wonder Girl's first tale?
She didn't exist!
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