Friday, April 07, 2006

Jimmy Olsen is One in a Million!


The population of Metropolis is about six million people.


How do I know this? Jimmy Olsen, of course.


Reading the Superman Family Showcase (which, as everyone knows, is really the Jimmy Olsen Showcase but DC didn't have the guts to call it that) is opening my eyes. I am learning about new things. How to use 4th dimensional forceps. Sending morse code messages with chalk dust. How to unthaw a dinosaur. I can't wait to show off at my next high school reunion.

Anyway, the story "The Six Jimmy Olsens" taught me that six people named Jimmy Olsen live in Metropolis. Now, trust me, you do not have the strength to know anything more about the story than that. Even I, whose Silver Fu is strong, so very strong ... even I, after reading the story, am now sequestered in the same urban Buddhist monastery where Eel O'Brien recovered, where I will need a semester of silence and separation from society to regain my composure. But the Absorbascon must go on.

Let's assume Metropolis is not significantly different statistically from our own world. Okay, that's a pretty big assumption, given that Metropolis seems to have about 10 times as many reporters as it does police, and the reporters are the one who have to stop all the crime. On the other hand, I live in Washington, D.C., so that seems pretty normal to me.

So, given that there are 296 people currently in the U.S. population named Jimmy Olsen, that means for each person named Jimmy Olsen there are just over one million other people.

Ergo, if there are six Jimmy Olsens in Metropolis, it's population should be about 6 million people. It also means that in Central City, there's a Jimmy Olsen on every block.

*Shudder*!

10 comments:

Jeremy Rizza said...

I'd love to see the six Jimmy Olsens battle the Three Lieutenants Marvel. That's a fair match-up, ain't it?

By the way, I felt just awful for the poor sap who got stuck with the moniker "Tubby Jimmy Olsen." That Jimmy should have told original-flavor Jimmy, "And we'll call you Douchebag Jimmy! How's that work for you?"

Anonymous said...

So,is at least ONE of these Elastic Lad? I gotta KNOW!!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm interested in where you found the figure of 296 people currently in the US. You'd expect the rate of 'Olsens' in the US to have declined over the past 40 years (this was printed in the 1960's, right?) as the percentage of people ethnically Hispanic, Asian, etc. have increased.

We could also ask if the Jimmy Olsen population would experience a natural growth or decline over 40 years. However, I think it's more fun to speculate on the population of Jimmy Olsens than to do any actual research on the matter.



Why yes, I realize this comment is taking things far to literally, but these are the odd things that occur to me sometimes. Plus, I find it amusing to type 'Jimmy Olsen population'.

Scipio said...

298 mllion, actually. Census Bureau's on-line population clock.

kalinara said...

Actually, it's funny but in the Green Lantern Secret Files and Origins story where Hal is a kid, his mother mentions something about an Olsen family with a son named Jimmy down the street.

It'd be too old to be the Superman-sidekick Jimmy Olsen, but not to be one of the six in six million. :-)

Anonymous said...

Fortunately the blocks in Central City are so huge, none of the Jimmy Olsens will ever meet one another.

Anonymous said...

Actually, I was asking aboutt 296 people with the name 'Jimmy Olsen' in the U.S. Is that in the online census data?

Anonymous said...

Well, if all the Jimmy Olsens were as cute as the one in the drawing you have posted, I wouldn't mind so much.

But then, I like redheads. Mrrrrrooowwww.

Scipio said...

Methane;

www.whitepages.com

It turns 300 instances of James Olsen, but 4 of them are merely close matches, not the name James/Jim/Jimmy.

KMP50 said...

I used to go out with a guy whose name was John Olsen - his father was James... And he was, in fact, a redhead... But that was a long time ago, when Metropolis' Jimmy Olse was still in his own magazine and wearing those oddball suits...