Well, it wasn't as bad as I was afraid it would be.
But it wasn't nearly as good as it deserved to be.
Superman/Clark Kent
David Corenswet
who is a REALLY BIG MAN, by the way--like, oddly, noticeably BIG, in a way no other Superman actor has ever been--
is quite fine as Superman. He carries it off, remaining believable despite Gunn's, well, Gunnisms (more on those later). He never swears (although there ARE several "goshes"), saves squirrels and (freaky bad CGI) babies, and really cares about people. Aesthetically, I rather like that his costume is not skin-tight; after all, he's got on a working outfit for putting out fires, he's not an aerobics instructor.
Et al.
The movie is full of supporting characters who do next to nothing, such as Ron Troupe, Steve Lombard, Cat Grant, even Martha Kent. But I mark that as a plus. Anybody's real life has lot of "supporting characters" in it, who are not all always essential element to every "plot" you are experiencing. I appreciate Gunn's inclusion of them just like that of the DCU's signature brands (Zesti Cola, Big Belly Burger, etc.).
Jimmy Olsen
The actor still seems a little off-model to me. But he is more on-model than almost every OTHER live-action Jimmy Olsen.
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I mean, we all know what Jimmy Olsen is SUPPOSED to look like. |
But the character is used well in the film. He's not a damsel in distress, but he's quirky, pro-active, gets his story in a characteristically weird way, and is, for no reason anyone in universe understands, attractive to the ladies.
Lois Lane
I don't know how this actress is but, well, not to be unkind, but she just doesn't seem IMPRESSIVE enough to be Lois Lane. Although she is certainly more on model than that Amy Adams (?) person. She simply doesn't seem sufficiently substantial to Superman's love interest (or even Clark's frankly). I'm no fan of Margo Kidder, but at least her Lois Lane was someone to be reckoned with.
Lex 'Bingo Caller" Luthor (Nicholas Hoult)
Look. Nicholas Hoult seems very nice. And pretty. But he was in WAY over his head in this role. You know what more frightening than Hoult's Lex Luthor? Gene Hackman saying, "Almost nobody", while not even ON SCREEN. Or "by causing the deaths of millions of innocent people".
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I am STILL unnerved by the inhuman coldness of that line, fifty years later. |
Hackman's Luthor may have been goofy but... that was part of the point. That didn't make him any less dangerous. Kind of goofy but still very dangerous is ALSO Superman's brand, remember.
Kevin Spacey could say "kryptonite" in the goofiest way imaginable, but I never doubted that he was exactly as brilliant as he claimed, dangerously as heck, and irremediably. And that's just Spacey, not even Spacey's Luthor.
Even Jesse Eisenberg
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poor, terminally weird Jesse Eisenberg |
seemed achingly smart (as all he characters do, I believe).
Hoult did the one thing you can't do as Luthor; he made me doubt Luthor's intelligence. Badly.
Eve Teschmacher
At first, I didn't like her. Then eventually I realized what they were doing with her and that everything I thought was wrong about her was.... my mistake. Also on the villain's side of things, I have to confess that Gunn's geek bait of Sydney Happersen and Otis Berg ... yeah, fine. He made me smile with those.
Hawkgirl
And the award for Least Impressive Hawkgirl of All Time goes to... whoever that actress was. Really, I can't even be bothered to look it up.
4
Quick, at this point what could be more trite than Alan Tudyk as an alien or a robot (AGAIN)? Answer: Alan Tudyk as an Alien Robot. This is the same kind of casting from the Geek Toolbox that gives us geek favorite Nathan Filion, looking every bit of 75 years old as Guy Gardner.
Mister Terrific
Fine; Mister Terrific WAS exactly as bad-ass as he should be. But why he should occasionally sound like a cast member of "Good Times' simply because he is black is beyond me and not really in character.
Metamorpho
Metamorpho looked terrible (and not in the way he is supposed to). Naturally, Andrew Carrigan was flawless in the part, because he always is. But the character uses his powers in EXACTLY the way he CAN'T, according to every single story the character has appeared in since his inception. It's just another piece of evidence that Gunn doesn't really care about what the characters are, but only about what function they can serve in the story he wants to tell.
Plot Twist
Believe it or not, I actually approve of the plot involving Jor-El and Lara. But I also remember that John Byrne did it first.
Plot Problems
I'm only going to list one:
Lex is desperate to make Superman look bad, eh? But he never uses HIS OWN SUPERMAN CLONE to frame Superman? Stupid.
Atrocious Gunnism
Oh, they were legion, I'm afraid. Here's a few.
- Fight scenes with diegetic pop music scores. I would have preferred simply watching Mr. Terrific kick ass, thank you.
- Supergirl as a drunken frat girl for comic relief.
- Krypto as comic relief. "What?! Krypto's out of control! That's hilarious!" No, it's not. The ONLY Krypto joke that comes close to landing is the dog's perfectly natural reaction to a T-Sphere.
- The Kents as comic relief. Just because the Kents are "simple farm folk" doesn't mean they would use bad grammar.
- The sadly GotG-style "Justice Gang" as comic relief. By the way, the idea that such a group would have a corporate sponsor WITHOUT yet having an agreed upon name and image is embarrassingly unrealistic.
- Was the Justice Gang fighting a giant evil beach ball in the background of a very serious conversation supposed to be funny? It wasn't. But that's just about what I would expect from Gunn.
- "So is 'Gary'." Is that supposed to be funny? Not only do I not find Gunn funny, I frequently can't even recognize his attempts at humor as such.
- Oh, no, are plunky sidekicks are about to fall off the edge of the building! Oh, whoops, it's okay!
- "I'm doing ... important stuff." Yeah; no. Superman is not a Marvel character, Gunn.
- Clark Kent, a professional reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper, completely blind-sided and nonplussed by Lois's straightforward report questions during their 'interview'? Leading to their faux relatable-couple badinage? Ugh. Gunn really can only write one style of character, it seems.
Many people will simply be happy to get a non-grimdark version of Superman and, yes, that's in the plus column. I simply hope that it is the message that resounds from this film, rather than Gunn's goofy, Marvel-style take on things.