Superman's new power.
For those who don't know, in the recent "Ulysses" storyline, Geoff Johns had Superman accidentally discover a new power: SUPER-FLARE!
Although Jeremy Rizza would prefer: super-FLAIR.
|"Puhlease! Once I'm done with this place it'll be SUPERfabulous! |
That bitch Bivolo will be green with envy!"
It's like an omni-directional unfocused version of heat vision that basically incinerates everything within an 1/8 of a mile. In Heroclix terms, if Heat Vision is Ranged Combat Expert, then Super-Flare is Pulse Wave.
First off; sure, it's a little crazy. But for that matter, so is most of what Superman does. Heat vision? Wait, light comes OUT of your eyes instead of.. INTO them? How does that even work? Freeze breath? Wait, you inhale and then, um, draw the kinetic energy OUT OF it, to make it really cold? What? Telescopic vision, and micro--well, you get the idea. Suffice it to say, "Superman can do the Captain Atom blow up thing, without blowing himself up" is probably more consistent with the rest of his powers than superventriloquism. Sure, why not?
|Actually that's more like 'super-weighing'.|
Second: do not let Batman name your powers. He's not good at it. Anyone else who saw Superman blow out all the solar energy stored in him in one all-engulfing shock wave would call it what it is: a super-nova. We've got a word that describes that exact phenomenon that already has the word super in it. Perhaps Batman thought "super-nova" wasn't a stupid enough name for it and picked something goofier on purpose. Because making sure that Superman seems cool--let's just say it's probably not one of Batman's highest priorities.
Third; it's only for extreme circumstances because he can't control it. That's good. Because being at the center of a big explosion is one of the ONLY things Shazam has on Superman, and now he's lost that edge. He's not going to be using it in the middle of Metropolis because that would result in untold loss of life and property damage, which Superman would never do. Except in a major motion picture.
|"I am NOT soiling my S on these shoddy hovels!"|
Fourth: it robs him of super-powers for 24 hours. This is so patently absurd that... okay, I love that, actually. It's completely ridiculous and totally Silver Age science. Because in the Silver Age, the unit of time for ALL silver-science phenomena is 24 hours. Aquaman can survive without water... until exactly 24 hours have passed. Green Lantern's ring can do anything at all ... until exactly 24 hours have passed, when it shuts down completely. The effects of Red Kryptonite, though unpredictable, often expire after 24 hours. Besides, it is such an unabashed set-up plot device! Superman needs to protect his secret ID for the office physical? Superflare those pesky powers away! Oh but then.... there's an emergency! WHAT WILL HE DO?!
|Well, what he's NOT going to is clean under the fridge, that's for sure.|
Fifth; yeah, you may not care, but this means Superman needs a new Heroclix dial! One that has an extra power Pulse Wave at his end dial, that double-action pushes him onto a powerless click that has Regen. Oh, yeah, that'll happen, no question. And it will be kind of awesome.
|Now THOSE are super-flares.|