Diana Invigorates the UN

"World Leaders Seek to Invigorate UN at age 60" the headline reads today.

Yeesh, how stupid are they! Any idiot who reads comic books knows how to do that:

hire Diana Prince.

Just look at what she could do for them -- on her first day!

<-- Publically condemn a U.N. sponsored contest to celebrate the beauty, grace, and unity of women worldwide. The U.N. should be hold contests judging women on the basis of their abilities for violent conflict, warmaking, and personal combat, just like the contest that chose Wonder Woman.

--> Throw herself at the first handsome diplomat who comes along, despite his obvious horror.

<-- Cry in a public place when her tawdry advances are rebuffed. By the way, Diana, when even blind men call you ugly, perhaps it is time to consider a make-over, dear.

--> Seek solace through group make-out sessions with overdressed Inuits (in a public place, of course). There's actually a young boy there below the frame, becoming a man; I had to crop it out because posting that sort of stuff on the internet will get you arrested, you know.

<--> Inspire young women in time-honored Amazonian ways.

Sorry, gang; the internet censors won't let me show you any more of the scene than this!

<--Experiment with turning man's instruments of warmaking ...


into a woman's tools for enjoying peace. -->

That's in public, in case you hadn't guessed

Diana really does seem to like chains and stuff, doesn't she? I wonder what that's all about... .

Naturally, she'd finish up with a big floor show, where she could--

<-- Make out with tribal performance artists and do a big dance number. I swear, I just don't know how she does it! I even hear that -- still on her first day -- she also rode bronco on a nuclear missile and used it to blow up a supervillain and his battleship in the nearby harbor! On her lunch hour.

Well, folks -- they don't call her Wonder Woman for nothing!