BATMAN #61
"A new day dawns for the Dark Knight Detective as Eisner Award-winning writer Matt Fraction (Hawkeye, Superman’s Pal Jimmy Olsen) joins forces with superstar artist Jorge Jiménez (Batman, Summer of Superman Special) for an unforgettable new era of Batman! The best superhero in comics gets a brand-new first issue to kick off this new era that will test Batman and Bruce Wayne like never before!"
Okay, we admit it; we broke Batman. More accurately, we broke Batman by letting a series of hack writers try to break Batman, again and again, as if trying to re-tell Daredevil's Only Good Story. So we're going to 're-start' Batman. Does that mean we'll wipe out decades-worth of accumulated narrative detritus such as the 14 Robins and the illegitimate son? Of course not! We won't get rid of ANYTHING. We'll just renumber the comic temporarily and give Batman a new costume, because ever since Batman's New Look in 1964, we think that's the answer to everything.
BATMAN #635 FACSIMILE
Written by JUDD WINICK
With the Bat-Family still reeling from a devastating loss and the Gotham underworld now largely under the control of Black Mask, a new player steps onto the field, bringing chaos in his wake! Just who is the Red Hood and what violent plans does he have for Gotham—and Batman?
We never give up our search for new lows, so we've finally hit upon: Facsimile Editions of JUDD WINICK comics.
ABSOLUTE BATMAN #12
Batman is at the mercy of the monstrous Bane. And though his body has seen better days, his mind and spirit are still strong. But how much longer can that withstand Bane’s brutal onslaught?
Only 12 issues in and we've already got him fighting "Bane", so now you have an idea how long we expect this to last.
RED HOOD #1
Jason Todd has left Gotham and Batman behind him. All he’s taking with him is his costume, his bike, and a metal briefcase containing two handguns (and lots of bullets). New Angelique seems like the perfect place for Red Hood to put down roots. There’s crime, vice, and corruption everywhere. When Jason discovers a superpowered serial killer who is targeting the city’s police, he finds himself sucked into a terrible and bleak conspiracy with seemingly no end in sight. But Jason isn’t the only person on the scene. Following his trail is Helena Bertinelli a.k.a. Huntress. Is she here to stop him or help him? What will happen when the two black sheep of the Bat-Family start working together?
"A lot of bullets". Is it, perhaps, 100 of them? Sounds like it to me.
CHEETAH AND CHESHIRE ROB THE JUSTICE LEAGUE #2
The perfect heist needs the perfect crew! To pull off the impossible and execute a heist on the Justice League’s Watchtower, Cheetah and Cheshire are going to need a little help. They need to put together a crew. A small crew who can work quick and smart. Megalomaniancs and wackos bent on world domination need not apply.
Hm. Female cat-villains. Guess we'll just ... pretend they are all Catwoman? She's the only popular one, so that's probably our best bet. Who's gonna notice?
WONDER WOMAN #25
Written by TOM KING
After days of searching through a mouse-infested world, Wonder Woman finally locates the lost Etta Candy and fugitive Amazon Emilie. Little does she know, they are hiding a tiny harbinger of death who will change Diana’s fate forever! You won’t want to miss the first appearance of the Matriarch in this oversize anniversary issue that will set the stage for all Wonder stories to come!
A Mouse-Man story hiding a "harbinger of death" that "will change Diana's fate forever" is about as close as Tom King can get to "whimsy", so what have we got to lose?
JUSTICE LEAGUE RED #2
Red Tornado conscripts Cyborg, but after his first mission, Vic, Green Lantern, and Power Girl aren’t ready to team up unless it’s to shut Reddy down. But RT can’t let anyone step out of line—to stop the future his analyses predict, he’s willing to leverage the one bargaining chip heroes can’t ignore.
Well, the whole spectrum corps thing helped revitalize interest in the Green Lantern Corps, so we are going to throw colored paint at the Justice League, too. Just don't ask us the "red" is the appropriate color for ROBOTS.
AQUAMAN #9
Aquaman has returned to Earth with new powers, new allies, and a new chance to be a father…all while a new mystery emerges from the depths of Atlantis! After the devastating events of the Battle of Dagon, Aquaman’s so-called Justice League Blue must regroup and refocus their efforts on Earth…and the return of one of the King of the Seven Seas’ deadliest enemies!
See above.
THE FLASH #25
With the Earth plunging into total darkness, all seems lost as Eclipso has turned the moon into his engine of despair. But Jai West and one of the Flash copies have a last-ditch plan in mind—that involves the West family dog? It all comes down to this explosive final chapter of “Bad Moon Rising”!
Yes. We ARE desperate enough to make you care about Wally West's family that we will be pitting his DOG against ECLIPSO.
NEW FUN COMICS #1 FACSIMILE
Written by MALCOM WHEELER-NICHOLSON, ADOLPHE BARREAUX, BERT SALG, KEN FITCH, JACK WARREN, JOE ARCHIBALD, LYMAN ANDERSON, ROBERT WEINSTEIN, EUGENE KOSCIK, and TOM McNAMARA
Whether you love tales of mystery and suspense, daring westerns, outer-space adventure, or funny animals, this book has it all! A brand-new era for the comics industry began right here—with the very first ongoing title made up entirely of all new stories, new art—new fun!
Even though this series lasted only six issues, and has zero historical significance (other than the appearance of Superman creators Siegel and Shuster's "Dr. Occult" in the final issue), there is probably some sucker who'll buy this, so why not?
1 comment:
Looks pretty grim. I remember how people derided Jim Shooter (RIP) for instructing his people to write good stories, but you know, there's something to to be said for that. As in I'm not sure the creative teams are bothering to ask themselves, "are we writing a story that people would finish and say, 'now that's a good story'?" It's entirely possible, and all too common, to write gimmick stories that get people to read but then not feel fulfilled. I see more than a little of that in the solicit.
You comment:
"Well, the whole spectrum corps thing helped revitalize interest in the Green Lantern Corps"
And that's kind of true, but also, it broke a lot of things. Back when the "Green Lantern" comic was about only one or two GLs at a time, team-ups with alien GLs were a real treat. But the 21st century has made it the norm, rather than the exception, to focus on dozens of GLs at a time. And then adding six more corps that are functionally interchangeable with the GLs just make the problem bigger and stupider. But damn if that doesn't illustrate the problem: gimmicks sell. It might well make for fans who can't remain invested long term, but it boosts sales this month.
(HJF1 opines: the other corps could have worked, if their deal were, they are inherently unstable because of their focus on one specific emotion, and they tend to fragment after causing a lot of damage. So when a tribe of Reds forms, it manifests as almost a hurricane of violence; or when a tribe of Blues appears, they tend to bliss out a society to the point of shutting down.)
- HJF1
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