Tuesday, August 23, 2005
Lois's High-Impact Haiku
Oh, nice try, Lois! But you were so distracted by the attempt on your life, you forgot the seven-syllable caption would have to go in the MIDDLE of your other two lines. D'oh!
Still, impressive use of stuttering to add the extra syllable in the last line; no wonder you got a Pulitzer.
"A sniper's bullet ...
[and during a shopping trip]
b- barely missed me!"
If ya ask me, I think she over-reacted. No doubt it was simply the DCU's League of Fashion Assassins aiming for her ridiculous tamarind Coco Chanel pillbox hat, purely out of a sense of decency and devotion to a well-dressed society.
Poet-readers; if you were Lois (or an onlooker, or the sniper!), what haiku would YOU have composed upon this occasion?
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Haiku
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14 comments:
Fun! Extra syllablee in the last line though;
how about just
"Epoxy-attached?"
That'll do it@!
Oh crap she saw me!
Sniping sucks, bad guy loses.
Superman is here.
Lois stress relief,
Shopping, she sees a sale!
Bullet misses brain.
Gloved hands wave!
Panic strikes Lois Lane!
Orange! Cringe!
LoFA membership,
must stop the awful trends!
Kill the gloved one!
I hate the brick walls!
Topple them all! Each brick falls!
By my sniper's bullets!
Jimmy, perched atop a distant roof, mutters to himself:
Can't you see he's mine?
Superman loves me, not you!
Die, orange temptress!
Shortly following the bullet's KRACK!, Lois monologues:
My life theatened? Yes!
Hot Kryptonian lovin'
Is coming my way.
Superman, watching from low earth orbit, shakes his head.
Dammit! She still lives.
I want to date other girls...
I suck at break-ups.
Each year at this time
The competition gets worse
January sales
From the alleged sniper:
Almost hit someone!
Have to find better way to
Remove grafitti
Okay, we're going to HAVE to make a website just for these...
Goddammit Lana
You had your chance in Smallville
Quit shooting at me
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Alas, poor building!
Struck down in its prime by a
badly-aimed bullet.
Jimmy must have bad
aim since I'm only seven
feet away from him!
If only I let
him touch my boobs last weekend
he wouldn't be mad.
Bonus points for putting the phrase "seven feet" in the middle of a haiku, Des!!!!
Cheers! What can I say?
Poetic inspiration
found through Lois Lane
(pssst...that's also a
haiku...but sadly this is
not quite a haiku.)
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