Richard Weds Barbara

Just because I think it's a terrible idea in "real life",

Naturally, I had Jim perform the ceremony.
Armed.

doesn't mean I don't think it's fun in fan-fic!

Mild-mannered, Clark sat in the back. 
On the floor.

"You may now--oh. son, I'm her dad, so no tongues, oka--ugh.
BRUCE. Take my revolver. NOW.
...
I don't care, BRUCE, put on GLOVES to touch it, then." 

You can only have so many guests but I tried to include the right ones.

"Let's see; Kryptonite for Clark and Connor, of course; a blowfish for Garth, some blow for Roy, shiny object for Wally; and Kate said she had a way to incapacitate the Parker kid.
I am glad I had time to prepare for the Reception." 

"If she'd have let me use my tactile kinesis even ONCE, it would have been me."

"Every hero deserves a heroine!
I know that's what I deserve."

"What a lucky guy."

"Chicken. I specifically checked and underlined CHICKEN as my entré choice at the Reception. If Dick SWITCHED it to fish, I'll gut him, groom or not."

"I guess it makes sense that Dick, always the best of us, would be the first to get married and to the best of gals, whereas I, always an also-ran and horn-dog like my mentor, will be a bachelor forever.  ...
Bruce's cousin is hot as fire."

"I really wish they'd have let me hire Jimmy to do the photography.  The fire and goat stampede at my wedding really wasn't his fault."

"It's okay that they don't call you Ch'Al Andar.  Do not hold their fondness for your earlier self against them.  Do not lose patience.  Do. Not. Lose. Patience."

"No, Clark, you may not 'spin platters'. I have a green rock in my lead-lined pocket and I'm not afraid to use it."

"But Dinah--"
"It's YOUR FAULT we weren't invited, Ollie, so you'll STAY on the dining room table until I hear that the Reception is OVER."