Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Captain America Week! Day Two: The Raccoon of Doom!

When we left Captain America in "Death Loads the Bases", Badgers' star player Diraggio had just keeled over DEAD at Home Plate, so naturally the game is called on account of dead people.


NOTHING TO BE ALARMED ABOUT --
THE GAME WILL GO ON!


WHAT TH--??!?!?! Someone DIED on the field, and the game goes on? Who the heck's running this joint... Fay Vincent?!

Well, maybe there's a rule for when someone dies that says whether the game should continue and under what circumstances. This being baseball, there probably is such a rule. Baseball has a rule for everything, including mid-game universal re-boots. You should see the stats for the DCU's 1986 and 1994 World Series.

I guess it's okay. Just because Diraggio dropped dead for no apparent reason, it's not like anyone else is in danger. Play ball!

Well, at least Adams got to second base.
Call a replacement victim from the bench!


Gods, how many people are going to die in this game? It's like watching the Teen Titans play baseball against Geoff Johns. Anyway, note that baseball players are a superstitious and cowardly lot. Nowadays, we'd be more likely to suspect a terrorist sarin attack than "t-t-the t-thirteen jinx".

But it's neither. It's...


Two mad glowing eyes, peering out of the darkness? It's a raccoon...?

No, it's ...

The Black Toad!
Ye gods, he's all black, with pointy ears, a triangle nose,almond eyes, sharp fangs, and a winglike cape...

JUST LIKE A TOAD!!!!!
at

12 comments:

  1. H8/11/2009 9:27 PM

    Please tell me that the Black Toad's true motivation will be revealed to be that he is killing players owned by other managers in his fantasy baseball league.

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  2. TotalToyz8/11/2009 9:58 PM

    Two words: "Grape Nuts".

    ReplyDelete
  3. LissBirds8/12/2009 12:06 AM

    What? You've never seen a toad with pointy ears before?!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Terence Chua8/12/2009 10:14 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Terence Chua8/12/2009 10:15 AM

    The Black Toad always reminds me of Nivlem from Kurtzman and Elder's "Woman Wonder" parody. See http://asylums.insanejournal.com/scans_daily/142115.html - specifically the third scan, which is http://pics.livejournal.com/dr_hermes/pic/001a7agb

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  6. steve mitchell8/12/2009 10:16 AM

    You know, there ought to be a way to combine HeroClix with MLB SportsClix to game this scenario.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Unknown8/12/2009 12:09 PM

    I, too, hope to get to second base before I die.

    ReplyDelete
  8. TotalToyz8/12/2009 12:22 PM

    You know, there ought to be a way to combine HeroClix with MLB SportsClix to game this scenario.

    See DC Super-Stars #10. Scipio even had me make a custom Sportsmaster, in his outfit from that issue!

    ReplyDelete
  9. steve mitchell8/12/2009 12:53 PM

    Well, all this talk about superheroes and baseball got me so excited, that when I went to the comic shop at lunch to get the new titles for the week, I also bought the Pizza Box Baseball game.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous8/12/2009 2:13 PM

    Forget the Red Skull, Arim Zola, Crossbones, Machinesmith, HYDRA, and AIM.

    Give us more BLACK TOAD!

    Seriously, did this character ever appear again?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Scipio8/12/2009 4:00 PM

    No. But you'll learn more about that later.

    ReplyDelete
  12. SallyP8/12/2009 7:18 PM

    "It's like watching the Teen Titans play baseball against Geoff Johns".

    I laughed and laughed.

    ReplyDelete