Okay, I have to go away for a few days to a Land That Time Forgot, an Internet Free Zone, the Brethren haven of my birth. This means leaving you on your own a bit.
So, here's a little diversion during my absence. You already know how this game is played!
Now it's YOUR turn to determine what each of the Justice Leaguers are thinking in this panel as they teeth-grittingly listen to Green Lantern's self-aggrandizing bloviation.
I look forward to reading your efforts when I return to the 21st century!
Wonder Woman: Boy, Aquaman sure likes to show off his guns, doesn't he? What a dork.
ReplyDeleteSnapper Carr: Hal Jordan is such a dreamboat! Sigh! Will he ever notice a normal man like me?
Flash: Man, Hal's feet stink!
Aquaman: I sure hope Wonder Woman notices my guns, because this is pretty uncomfortable!
Martian Manhunter: I wonder if I should alter my look...perhaps make my forehead stick out more...what's Hal talking about, again?
Superman: Enjoy the spotlight while you can, you fool!
Green Arrow: Geez, can't a brother get a chair? Even the Atom got one!
Batman: Gee, whiz! I love my life! I love to hang around and smile like an empty-headed toolbox! Oh, is Hal talking about something?
Snapper: Oh Green Lantern - why does staring at your perfect feet give me such pleasure?
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: Aquaman has such terrible posture!
The Flash: WonderifIrisisupforanoonerIthinkI'llgoseeWOWthatwasgreat!
Aquaman: Sure, he's smug now. But wait until he finds out where the octopus is hiding...
"Martian Manhunter": The fools! They don't realize that I, Lex Luthor, the greatest criminal mastermind in the world, have abducted the Martain and painted myself green so I can impersonate him and bring down the Justice League once and for all!
Superman: I'll give Lex five more minutes before I reveal that my power of Super-Smelling allowed me to smell the green dye, turtle wax and TAG Body Spray.
Green Arrow: When he's done, I'm gonna lean over like this and do my Long John Silver voice. Arrrrr!
Batman: Bastards! First time I ever smile and none of them notice!
Flash: I wonder how Green Lantern keeps his boots so shiny?
ReplyDeleteBatman: I've heard more believable stories from Robin when I found that copy of Muscle Men Monthly under his mattress.
Snapper: That's right, keep boasting; the day will come when I betray you all!
Wonder Woman: Blah, blah, blah. I hope I remembered to set the TiVo for "Whose Wedding Is It Anyway"!
Snapper Carr - Hal's feet are dreamy
ReplyDeleteSnapper Carr: Little do they all know that underneath my boyish smile lurks a secret pain I can never share with them!
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: When is Zatanna going to get her cute butt over here? This party is a total sausage fest!
The Flash: I'm glad Hal's here. He makes me seem interesting.
Aquaman: That's it, feel the burn...Stretch those biceps...
Martian Manhunter: Snapper's secret pain is so lame! I can't wait until we send him out to get us some lattes and I can make fun of him in front of everyone else!
Superman: I'm missing Lawrence Welk for this?
Green Arrow: I think I'm going to start growing a beard. Batman doesn't have a beard.
Batman: Stop smiling, doofus! You're supposed to be the Dark Knight, not Smiley McSmilerson!
Superman: I'll give Lex five more minutes before I reveal that my power of Super-Smelling allowed me to smell the green dye, turtle wax and TAG Body Spray.
ReplyDeleteand
Green Arrow: I think I'm going to start growing a beard. Batman doesn't have a beard.
had me cracking up. I knew I shouldn't have read these during class.
Me, I started laughing aloud when Lex Luthor was revealed. it's so obvious now that matt pointed it out!
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: "Should I be the one to tell him he's got ketchup on the side of his mouth?"
ReplyDeleteSnapper: "He's DREAMY!"
Flash: "Pretend to look interested, pretend to look interested, pretend..."
Aquaman: "What a putz."
J'onn: "Damn, those are nice boots. I should buy some like that."
Superman: "Starro's invading the Eastern Seaboard and we're all sitting around listening to this idiot?"
Green Arrow: "Don't laugh, don't laugh, don't..."
Green Lantern: "Me me me me me me me me"
Batman: "Joker... serum... overpowering me... can't... stop... smiling!"
Snapper: Oh, man, at some point Hal's gonna uncross those legs, and I'm front row center!
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: Are these lame-o's really the kind of people you came to the mortal world to hang out with?
Flash: What smells like fish? Is it Aquaman, or is it Wonder Woman? And which would be worse?
Aquaman: Seriously, what WOULD Green Lantern do if I just popped him one in the mouth?
Martian Manhunter: Da doo doo doo, de da da da, is all I've got to say to you...
Superman: I'll bet I could paint a toaster yellow, and then drop it in Hal's bath before he can even do anything about it.
Green Arrow: Is Snapper looking at ME? Oh, man...okay, just smile back, don't blow this!
Batman: Heh, I can't wait to get home and see if Dick's wearing that Speedo I bought him!
It's so fun I have to play again!
ReplyDeleteSnapper Carr: I wonder if Ollie is going to be pissed that I sold Speedy my entire stash of black tar heroin?
Wonder Woman: I changed my hairstyle three days ago and none of these bastards have said a thing!
The Flash: Batman thinks he's so hot because he has a cooler Rogue's Gallery! I bet his 'tude would change once he found out that a boomerang in the nuts hurts a @#%& more than a @#%&*@ riddle!
Aquaman: They say that they're my friends, but I can hear them giggling behind my back. I knew I shouldn't have let Mera talk me into the orange outfit!
Martian Manhunter: I wonder if Ollie's going to be pissed that I personally taught Black Canary all of the positions in the Martian Kama Sutra.
Superman: By Krypton if they ever knew how many farts I hear per second they'd appreciate why I can't wipe this damn smile off my face. The human digestive system is so freakin' hilarious!
Green Arrow: Goddamn Nixon! I'd sure like to settle his hash!
Batman: Why do people keep saying I'm a downer? I can be fun! Look, I'm smiling! I'm a happy guy! Why doesn't anyone love me?
Snapper: I can't get enough of those sweet emerald feet!
ReplyDeleteAquaman: Surely my belt symbol will let everyone know, my crotch is greater than everything above it.
Snapper: Right on! With Hal yapping away, no one will realize how retarded the idea of the JLA having a mascot is!
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: Steve Trevor doesn't seem interested anymore. These shorts aren't nearly slutty enough. Maybe I should go for a higher cut. And when Mike Deodato is drawing me, a thong.
Flash: The cosmic treadmill seemed like a swell idea until I went into the future and found out I die next month. Sob.
Aquaman: Right on! With Hal yapping away, no one will realize how retarded the idea of the JLA having Aquaman is!
Martian Manhunter: I laugh, but I grow weary of Hal's boasting. And I sense my near-nakedness makes everyone uncomfortable. I want to start my own JLA with my new friends Vibe and Gypsy, but Bruce was smart enough to trademark the name. Ah, well. It was a good dream.
Superman: It's been six months, and I still don't get it. How would Luthor benefit by creating a huge, misshapen landmass that no one would ever want to live on? It just doesn't make sense.
Green Arrow: J'onn. I know you can hear my thoughts. Look, I know you said the time you shape-shifted into Power Girl, and we fooled around was a one time thing, but Dinah kicked me out again, and...well, a brother has needs, you know?
Batman: Gosh, I love these guys. Just for fun, let me think about how I'd kill each of them.
Snapper: Oh! Say it isn't so! The will-deadening beam?! And you overheard what? How, in heaven's name did you escape Hal?!!!
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: Hmm... I wonder how far I can roll my eyes back in my head. Oh... woah! I bet this looks totally cool!! I have to get Kal's attention.
Flash: What did I have for dinner last night? Pasta? No, that was the night before...
Aquaman: Maybe if I stand like this, the wedgie will work it's way out...
Martian Manhunter: Where's a loose ceiling tile when you need one?
Superman: This is my noble just-saved-a-baby-from-a-fire face. This is my just-kicked-evils-ass face. This is my remember-kids-drugs-are-bad face.
Green Arrow: Speedy?! There must be at least a hundred possible arrow-related sidekick names and the goddamn kid picks Speedy? WTF?
Green Lantern: And I would have returned to warn you all sooner, had I not had a treacherous run-in with a suicidal ceiling tile...
Batman: My God! What is Wonder Woman doing?! Its like a car-wreck... It's horrific, but I can't look away.
"Like, Lantern's the MOST! I'm sent!" *snap* *snap*
ReplyDelete"This is fun, but I can hardly wait until I can change into my secret disguise of...clothes."
"Is that...is that fungus? I could take a sample and analyze it in the lab before he even stops yakking. Then again, so could Snapper."
"Oh sure--the caption cuts MY head off, but not KAL's."
"I can't believe I not only have to see this crap in his head, but I have to listen to it too."
"Could I take J'onn? I bet I could take J'onn. No, maybe I couldn't take J'onn. Wait, I probably could take J'onn..."
"All the money my corporation dumps into this place, and they can't even get enough chairs for everybody?"
"Lovely....Absolutely looovely...Who'd believe the loooveliness...of meeee."
"This is great! Hal's lulling drone has kept me from thinking of how my parents were brutally gunned down in a filthy alley for a whole 5 minutes!"
Wonder Woman: I see a little silhouetto of a man! Scaramouche, scaramouche, will you do the fandango?
ReplyDeleteScanpper Carr: Thunderbolt and lightning...very very frightening me...!
Flash: Galileo, galileo, galileo, galileo, galileo, figaro...
Aquaman: Magnifico!
Martin Manhunter: But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me!
Superman: He's just a poor boy from a poor family! Spare him his life from this monstrosity!
Green Arrow: Easy come easy go,will you let me go?
Batman: Bismillah! No! We will not let you go!
Snapper: How can he perform such amazing heroic stunts... with such beautiful feat!
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: If he'd shut up within the next ten minutes, I can still have enough time to go into town and watch the marching bands at the Happy Harbor vs. Providence high school football game.
Flash: I could vibrate my hand into his brainpan... but he may not even notice.
Aquaman: Platforms! I forgot to get Mera's new shoes while I was in New York... oh man, she's going to kill me.
Martian Manhunter: I've shape-shifted into Lex Luthor, and no one even noticed. I may as well be invisible.
Superman: Meteor about to hit the planet? No, I used that excuse last week. Lois trapped in quicksand? Hmm... yeah, I think that will work.
Green Arrow: I don't know what Carrol Ferris sees in this guy. Oh well, at least she's putting out for me.
Batman: I hope it's spaghetti night!
"Lovely....Absolutely looovely...Who'd believe the loooveliness...of meeee."
ReplyDeleteYou get points for the "A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum" reference.
I have to agree with Matt; big extra points for that one.
ReplyDeleteSnapper: Ahhhhh ... silent but deadly!
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: What IS J'onn's fascination with Ernest Borgnine anyway?
Flash: I just realized -- Hal doesn't have toes, he has spatulas.
Aquaman: Boy, that Ant-Man sure is a loser ...
Martian Manhunter: It worked! I can make Snapper fart any time I want.
Superman: Just another few seconds of x-ray vision, and Hal will be sterile.
Green Arrow: Well I'll be damned -- it's Superman's elbow!
Batman: This is the best birthday party I've ever had!
Snapper: Every word...every beautiful word he utters is my new favourite song.
ReplyDeleteWonder Woman: Arthur is an 8, Kal's a 10, Oliver's a 7, J'onn...I'm not even going to touch that one.
Flash: "Will-deadening beam?" Were you up all night thinking up that one, ass?
Arthur: When he doesn't speak, Hal's about an 8, but by Neptune's beard, if that man can't talk himself down to a 2!
J'onn: It's like, these guys can only hear what Hal says. If they only knew the absurdity that rattles around this man's brain.
Superman: I've never really noticed before, but Hal has really slim legs. Like a chick.
Oliver: Maybe an arrow that plays mp3s?
Batman: This douchebag has exactly .5 seconds to get his feet off the table I paid for before he gets a batarang in each of them.
Hal: "Man, these are some truly excellent tube socks!"
ReplyDeleteSuperman: "I wonder what they really think of my new hoodie..."
Green Arrow: "If I stay very still, no one will notice that I snuck into the meeting."
Aquaman: "One more word from Hal, and I'm gonna slap the bejeezus out of him."
Flash: "Wow Hal, way to save the day by using your secret power of getting captured."
Martian Manhunter: "His new hoodie looks ridiculous."
Wonder Woman: "What we can't even afford a full panel? What the hell is this, Dick Tracy?"
Snapper: "Those are some sweet-ass tube socks."
Batman: "Wait...to get to the other side...now I get it! Brilliant!"
Snapper: "*sigh* Mrs. Snapper Jordan...I guess I like the sound of that."
ReplyDeleteAquaman: "I'm thirsty. and why don't i get a chair? stupid air-breathers."
Manhunter: "Does he have to put his feet RIGHT in front of me? Stupid earthlings!"
Batman: "i bet out of all us, Hal's the most likely to snap and destroy a city. start devising take-down plan."
Superman: I'm missing Lawrence Welk for this?
ReplyDeleteGreen Arrow: I think I'm going to start growing a beard. Batman doesn't have a beard.
Nice.
Snapper: Like, I am SO out of here. I'm
ReplyDeletegonna accept that gig with Marvel. "Rick
Jones." I like the sound of it..."
WW: Hmmf. Mmmf. No matter how I struggle,
I can't get into frame. Will one of you
guys untie me now? Oh, wait. Don't bother.
>Tee hee<
Flash: I dont know what Iris's problenm
is... What did she think "Fastest Man
Alive" meant, anyhow?
Aquaman: I don't care what they say. The ability
to talk to fish is TOO a cool super-power.
It is, it is, it is..
JJ: What the'... Omigawd, I forgot to put
on my shirt AGAIN! Funny, the others
never seem to notice...
Superman: Its a bird. Its a plane. Its ME.
Hee, hee. I love that bit...
GA: Man, J'onn forgot to put on his shirt
again. Martian BO is the worst!
GL: Oh, who am I kidding? I know they all
laugh at me. I dont have any super-powers;
its all the ring! It's just the ring!
Bat: I dont care what GA says. Robin is way
hotter than Speedy, any day.
Oh my god, there's so much helpful info here!
ReplyDeleteBaltimore homes