Because you can't handle it.
Remember how at the end of Time Bandits, there's that chunk of Pure Evil that evaporates the parents when they touch it? Well, the Showcase Presents Martian Manhunter Vol. 2 is Pure Lunacy. If you buy a copy and drop it in your local reservoir, your city will look like a mass break-out at Arkham Asylum within 72 hours.
- Giant squirrels?
- Flying meter maids?
- Holes in the sky?
- Snakes fighting ferris wheels?
- Bank-robbing genies?
- A tank disguised as a fruit salad?
- Dinosaur gargoyles?
- Mechanical bear weapons?
- The freedom rings of doom?
- The evil, sentient orchestra instruments?
You are not ready for the Showcase Presents Martian Manhunter Vol. 2.
But you may need to get ready...
You had me at flying meter maids.
ReplyDeleteHm. My goodness.
ReplyDeleteWashington sure has changed since the last time I visited, if that qualifies as insanity. Add in alternate side of the street parking, and it sounds like a typical day in New York.
(Giuliani tried to convince the giant alligators in the sewer to eat the giant squirrels, but they wouldn't have any of it. Bloomberg has been similarly unsuccessful, which is why he wants another term.)
Hey, Scipio. I almost sent Flying Monkey a postcard last week asking why you haven't posted on it yet. There is one mention of an Apex company during a Diabolu story.
ReplyDeleteNobody takes the threat of nefarious musical instruments as much it deserves. I appreciate Absorbascon raising awareness of evil music.
ReplyDeleteScip, now you know what to get me for Klordny!
ReplyDeleteI love the giant with the magnifying glass.
ReplyDeleteAlso, "A Suspense Weirdie..."?
You forgot the glory of the ultimate melon-headed arch-nemesis of the Manhunter from Mars, PROFESSOR ARNOLD HUGO!
ReplyDeleteI didn't know they were coming out with a Showcase Volume 2. In my fear I thought people wouldn't buy enough of Volume 1 to warrant anymore.
ReplyDeleteToo bad I'm now too terrified to get Volume 2 :(
Man oh man, Time Bandits is a good movie...
ReplyDeleteThe sheer horror of the insanity that you propose boggles the mind! What steps can I take to prepare?
ReplyDeleteAt one point I actually HAD the book with the flying orchestra creatures. They were playing weird music and luring folks all over everywhere. The Bass really freaked me out.
ReplyDelete"I shall read this, then EVERY ISSUE of Superman's Pal Jimmy Olsen! And NO ONE shall stop me!!"
ReplyDelete"You FOOL!! You'll DOOM US ALL!!!"
If you think the Idol-Head stories are wacky, wait until you get to the Marco Xavier tales. Brutal.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for this article, pretty useful material.
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